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Grandpa Rick is a grumpy person that is occasionally nice.. occasionally..Anyway he's been working on this blog template for the about 2 days and is pretty bothered by the fact that it took him so long to remember how to use Macromedia Dreamweaver again.

His help eventually came in the form of LYC his "son" and miss poutyface his mei.. With the utmost torment by lawrence to work hard, he finally was able to create this below average template with (finally!) working layers.

Go ahead and have a good time reading (or laughing at) this blog and above all remember that God loves you.

Grandpa Rick is in actual fact 19 (just barely) at the point of completion of this blog template (26th October 2006) having already had his birthday on the 22nd of October.

Born into a family with a father that lacks hair and a brother that has too much of it growing on his legs, Grandpa Rick grew up traumatised by his older brother that occasionally liked to sit on him and has a weird fetish thing going on with anime figurines. His parents however were a blessing to him and aside from the odd argument from time to time, Grandpa Rick usually listens to them. He also has a poor traumatised younger sister that is constantly the butt of his fat jokes (though it cannot be helped seeing as to how she walks into most if not all of them) but he tries to take good care of her.. operative word being TRY of course. All in all poor Grandpa Rick has been traumatised by his siblings when he was younger and now get along with them more or less fine.. However the trauma he suffered as a child has given him quite the quirky attitude to life.

The biggest influence to his life however is God. Grandpa Rick old (or young if you want) as he is is deeply in love with God. The person that has helped him through all his troubled times and the one that has sent many a friend his direction when he needed help. God has always been there for him and Grandpa Rick is very grateful. He often gets inspired by God to write poetry (which can be found along with other things in all "All that good stuff") or songs without the lyrics in tribute of God. Grandpa Rick believes that God died to save him from all sin and believes that God is his lord and saviour.

Through many close and personal encounters with God, Grandpa Rick is certain about God's love and God's plan for his life. He hopes to live in God's way and let God guide him in all that he does. Of course, Grandpa Rick is still learning and is prone to the occasional (oh alright, frequent) mistake. But the key point here is that Grandpa Rick loves God and that there is nothing that he wouldn't do for Him.

Finally it is to be said that it isnt a good thing to get Grandpa Rick angry.. you see old people dont handle anger very well and goodness knows what happens when Grandpa Rick goes over the edge.

Also one should note that when Grandpa Rick gets angry..bad things can happen.. there was a reason why they say you should respect your elders.. now be nice and show some respect to the wizened old fool that owns this blog.. fine im not that old..but im getting older now..


Oh yes, also it should be duely noted that Grandpa Rick has plenty of funny ideas.. not all good.. so use your own decernment before doing what he says.. you never know what that crazy idea might get you into.. seriously.. you never know..its been frequently known that his ideas get people into ALOT of trouble.. well some of them or most of them.. well you get the picture..

Often called a very disturbed individual by his good friend Brian, Grandpa Rick likes to get into meaningless arguements with Brian just because he (Brian) walks into alot of his comebacks.. well anyway his (Grandpa Rick) greatest circle of friends are in church.. all of whom have helped him through very tough periods in his life..

This is the All that good stuff layer.. in here will be my personal top 10 or top 20 list of songs to hear.. (be very prepared for alot of punk rock) also included will be all the poetry that i have ever written almost all of which are God inspired.. just becasue God is so good to me! other things may be added i guess.. like pictures and stuff if i have the time (and if i actually do take pictures). This is an experimental layer basically where all the stuff i think about (most of them very weird.. you have officially been warned) that dont go into my post will be posted here. alright lets get started

Top 20 Praise and Worship Songs (this list may and most probably will change)

20. For This Cause
19. Every Move I Make
18. Reflector
17. Awsome God
16. Majesty (here i am)
15. At The Cross
14. From The Inside Out
13. Lord I Lift Your Name On High
12. Great Is Our God
11. Beautiful Saviour
10. Majesty
9. The Freedom We Know
8. We fall down
7. Mighty To Save
6. Salvation Is Here
5. All Of My Days
4. Open Up The Gates
3. Lord We Want To Lift Your Name On High
2. My Redeemer Lives
1. Lift Up Your Eyes

Top 20 Other Songs (again list might and most probably will change)

20. Emotionless
19. Chasing Cars
18. Pretty Fly For A White Guy
17. SARvivor Rap! (haha i find it damn funny..so sue me)
16. Of All The Gin Joints In The World
15. 1985
14. All For One
13. Motivation
12. Follow Me
11. Bloody Valentine
10. Suger We're Goind Down
9. Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner
8. 7 Minutes In Heaven
7. Slide
6. Sophomore Slump Or Comeback Of The Year
5. Iris
4. The Rock Show
3. Music Or The Misery
2. A Little Less Sixteen Candles
1. My Heart Is The Worst Kind Of Weapon

Top 5 bands

5. Good Charlotte
4. Greenday
3. Sum 41
2. Goo goo dolls
1. Fallout boy

the secret link to what i really think

Amusing or meaningful statements i've made or heard (statement in front source behind)

"You're gona be a what?! .. wait wait this is big shit.." - Brian

"God said Husbands love your Wives.. He definately didn't say understand them" - My Father

"As soon as you fall in love with a girl, She rips your heart right outa your behind" - The Wedding Singer

"Go tell him he just lost a vote" - Enraged woman at a reserved carpark

"Worship is the outcry of one's soul longing to exalt the Almighty God" - Me

"You are but a speck of nothingness in the whole universe that God created.. but He still loved you enough to create you and know you by name" - what i realised after i read the first verse of the bible.(i consider this point to be the time i truely started my walk with God)

"Beer beer beer, tiddley beer beer beer..." - drunk people sining in the game A Bard's Tale

"Stop living in the past.." - Caleb after one very emotional altar call

"DID SOMETHING CRAWL IN HERE AND DIE?!" - Problem Child 2

"WAH LAH MAH! BUGGER.. UNEDUCATED PERSON!" - Old man with his group of friends under joel's block

"Seseme street advocates homosexuality because it depicts two grown up best friends Bert and Ernie showering together in the same bath-tub.. now is that the kind of values you want to teach your child as they are growing up?" - Debate team of ACJC when i visited their open house

"Come la! 1 on 1 no problem!" - 14 year old kid over the phone before he realised i was 18

"uh.. dont want already.. your too big" - same kid after i told him my age

"UUUUUNNNNNNNNGGGGGHHH!!!!" - John Pang after gettin water dripped into his ear in the middle of the night while he was sleeping

"rawrr!" - half the girls i know (they roar for some strange reason..varying tones)

"Knowing Christ died.. thats history.... knowing Christ died for me.. now thats salvation!" - read at a shop in sim lim square

"God formed us, sin deforemed us, Christ transformed us" - same shop in sim lim square

"The heart has reasons that reason knows not of" - Blaise Pascal

"Le coeur a ses raisons que la raison ne connait pas" - Blaise Pascal (the original version of the quote above in french)

"Listen, I got a mud monster threatening to crawl out of my butt right now.. i cant talk.. call you back" - someone on the street as he rushes past me into the toilet whilst on the phone.

"Im a vegetarian.. but i eat chicken and fish and pork and..." - Jason ng

"STOP IT LA!" - Jason in a very high pitched squeaky voice

"If you shake it more then twice you're playing with it" - The hot chick

"You're a very disturbed individual arn't you?" - Brian

"What narcissistic personality disorder? im am perfect, i dont have no funny disorder" - Joel Pang after i told him he had narcissistic personality disorder
"Haha i don't know.. more kick" - Joel

Poetry (expect this to be very long)

Longings of my soul

never did i think that I
could hear God through the softest sigh
or feel his presence in a gentle warm touch
a feeling that tells me He loves me so much
evermore my soul cries out
You are my God i have no doubt
forever my lips will worship thee
God of all i bow my knee
to You my God and its only true
that i give my heart and soul to You

My Praise to Him

my Lord my God i give you all my Praise
for Your love and everlasting grace
for there is none like You on earth
nothing i find that has more worth
to You my God my all i surrender
to Your glory and matchless splendor
why oh Lord did You choose to die
for one so undeserving as I?
i'll never know the answer to that
but i know u did and thats a fact
i can only explain that its Your grace
a question i'll ask when i see Your face
for You alone my Lord and King
are deserving of all the praise i sing
O Lord my God my heart yearns for thee
longing to ever walk in all your ways
when praising you my heart's set free
i'll worship thee for all my days
King of kings i look to you
guide me daily in my walk
in all the actions that i do
even in my speech and talk
give me Your wisdom as i pray
give me faith in You my saviour
in everything i do each day
in my life and my behaviour
all this my Lord i pray to thee
that your word will set me free
that forever more i'll look to You
to guide me Lord in all i do
mold me Lord into Your will
and in my life Your will fufill

my worship to God

if all you actions were your worship to God
how differently would you act?
would you shout for joy with all your heart?
or be ashamed at what you lack?
how diferent would your actions be?
what difference will it show?
would you still just act the same
in the name of Him that knows?
sometimes i feel torn between
the things i do in life
because i know the things i do
cause many people strife
if my life were my worship to God,
my heartfelt praise unto my Lord
how much more i'd give Him praise
how much more my voice i'd raise
but it'd be more than just my singing
it'd be more than praises i'd be bringing
my actions would be my worship to Him
no longer would they be done on a whim
in every little thing i do
my God i do it unto You
for more then just my life alone
my God i give you my heart's throne
my Lord help me in all i do
help me live my life for You
all my thoughts and all my actions
will be of You and not of distractions
Lord my worship unto thee
will be my life of which you are the key
so take my life my Lord i pray
draw me closer to You each day
keep me and hide me in Your arms
that ever more i'd feel your calm
Lord to You my life i give
and evermore for You i live

Kester's Ego Booster

kester is a ladies man
he attracts all girls like no guy can
guys all marvel at his skill
of attracting girls when he's standing still

though he keeps denying that he's hot
we can never tell what he thought
when all the girls said he was best
when i asked them so i could test

even the other guys in church
agrees hes not left in the lurch
cos he's so hot he'll never be
alone by himself for all to see

why does he keep denying it
kester, dont go into a fit
its a compliment that is so true
you shouldn't be feeling that so blue

cos kester ur hot why dont u see?
ur the honey and girls, they're bees
they swarm to you all through the year
a person like you should never fear

he sucks all girls like a strong magnet
to all girls he can connect
for he is one fine nice guy
and he doesnt even need to try

i must say that though he's short
his appeal to girls sure is not
if fact if we were to compare
of girls he'd have more than his share

when the street he walks down by
all the girls will swoon and sigh
they walk to him and say he's hot
not just one girl but a lot

jealous guys from everywhere
always walk by him and stare
why'd he have such attractive power
even when he doesnt shower

girls will find him quite a guy
cos around him they never feel shy
he even doesn't need to show off
he's always first and never fourth

of course he'll always be the first
cos after him the girls all thirst
always hoping to catch the sight
of kester kiong their mister right!

they love his cute manly name
kester kiong gets the fame
he's always asked to act in shows
making brad pitt his arch foe

but more even better is his mass appeal
he makes girls scream and even squeal
movies posters charts Galore
he could open his own store!

you'll see his face on every wall
no wall doesn't have his face at all
as he walks by girls scream his name
and those screaming girls you cannot tame

cos around him they all turn ape
they all stare at his manly shape
cos he works out for hours on end
and iron bars he's able to bend

his muscular arms that are oh so strong
attracts girls' stares for very long
he gets love letters all the time
one girl even sent him lime

the lime was not ordinary
inside it contained a cherry
and in the cherry a little note
a confession of love in it she wrote:

kester kiong you are so hot
hotter than a boiling pot
you are sweet as sweet can be
would you come over for some tea?

and after that mayb go out
for lunch and a little walk about
and dinner after that maybe
so i can show u that i love thee

how to reply? was what he thought
cos after all I am so hot
i've got lotsa choices over there
over here and everywhere

but then he thought nah im too young
and she doesnt speak my mother tongue
so i guess i wont go out with her
cos my mum wont allow me thats for sure

i'll wait till i am much older
than maybe i'd be much bolder
anyway im still in my prime
i've got lotsa, lotsa time

thus ends our tale of kester the hot
this guy is definately worth a shot
though if you try you may not succeed
cos it takes alot to win him indeed

i wonder the reaction we will get
by telling him this poem of yet
will he scream or burst out laughing?
we'll soon find out but now we know nothing

Turn to Him!

when ur feeling lost and alone
when u feel the world's harsh tone
you dont really know where to go
you fear that people hate you so
all the things you say and do
hoping to make the world see you
but you're covering up inside
and refuse to admit because of pride
and all your excuses and all your lies
while deep inside your heart cries
trying to find the deeper meaning
trying to ignore your own heart's screaming
always looking out for yourself
winning trophies to put on your shelf
wanting whats best for you alone
money and cars and the latest handphone
or maybe this girl or guy you see
thinking thats the girl or guy for me
but still your heart feels all so empty
burdened and tied down, and not free
you try and try to fill that hole
you try to stop the cries of your soul
your heart is confused and so are you
maybe you need more things better and new!
but no matter what you buy or do
even trying many a brew
it doesnt help, it doesnt matter
at the end of the day your friends all scatter
except for one or maybe two
the friends who which you hardly knew
but they care for you and share with you
the thing that changed their life anew
they tell you of a God that lives
and His life for you he freely gives
it was for you thats why He came
for you He died and rose again
when you heard this your heart felt peace
finally the much needed release
but you find it hard to move away
and by your other friends you get swayed
but finally after many a day
you realise theres no other way
your friends all left you down and out
you feel so angry you want to shout
but your two friends they come again
preaching the good news of Jesus' regin!
you know its true and you believe
never again will you decieve
yourself that things and material worth
be bigger than God's own birth
He sent his son to die for you
through torture and shame He went through
but He never complained and never whined
because He knew that someday its Him you'll find
He came and died for every sin
He came to cleanse you from within
everything you have said and done
for you God came and gave his Son
He knows all things that is to come
He knows the lies you told to your mum
yet He still forgives and forgets
and what He did He has no regrets
He came for you and knows your name
He has taken all your shame
He truely loves you for who you are
not for what your things or your car
finally you find you are free
cos Jesus Christ is Lord over thee

Dreams

these dreams they haunt my sleep at night
and i cant stop them try as i might
never different yet never same
never dreams of money or fame
comming not so frequently
but still with such intensity
these dreams they shift the way i think
though in reality they dont really link
somehow i feel that my whole world changes
down to the way i look at strangers
it makes me all confused inside
in my heart where my secrets i hide
what could these dreams possibly mean
and why from my head cant they be cleaned
so confused inside my soul
as if my heart hasnt enough woe
my mind keeps thinking about all this
making sure that not a detail is missed
but why do these dreams keep comming back
is it trying to tell me of what i lack
i dont know at all one bit
and thinking about it is giving me a fit
my head hurts and my tongue's tied
but worse is what i feel inside
oh woe is me for what i feel
but in my heart shall it be sealed
not for anyone to see
for no one shall know but me

All He's done for me

through my darkest lonely days
when in my heart is where sin stays
through all the hurt and all the sorrow
when i didnt know about tomorrow
though the times i couldnt go on
through the days that i just mourn
though the times i fought with You
and all the hurt i've put You through
through all the times i've dis-obeyed
through all the times i should have prayed
when all i ever felt was dread
and when that feeling seemed to spread
when my life was such a mess
and it was all that You detest
when i sang You were my king
but i didn't mean what i sing
when all i ever did was lie
and all the times i wanted to die
and though i have put You to shame
i am not the one You blame
You never did give up on me
You never would in all eternity
how unworthy i am of such grace
i don't deserve this in the first place
oh the extent of Your mercy divine
unworthy i am to call it mine
for what i've done isn't at all mild
but still You call me Your child
how undeserving i am of Thee
oh my Lord my king my majesty!
for me You died to save my life
for me did You go throgh all that strife
for me to say that i am free
was because You died just for me
this love You have that knows no bounds
this love that cleanses and astounds
its Your love that saved the mankind
its Your love that i will shine
for You are my one and only king
and from the depths of my heart will i sing
that You will always be my saviour
and forever will i seek Your favor
for You were the only perfect one
for us did You send Your son
i thank You Lord for forgiving me
for opening my eyes for me to see
that my sins You have washed away
and in my heart is where You stay
and i welcome Thee Lord into my heart
and into its innermost secret parts
where You will reign over my life
which i give You as a sacrifice
forever Yours to keep and use
in whatever way that You may choose
my God forever You remain
and of my God i have no shame
i will love You all my days
and i will follow in Your ways
for You forgave me of everything
and forever of Your love i will sing
and so to the earth i will declare
of Your love and i will share
Your word to everyone i know
and Your love to them i will show
and finally to the world i shout
I LOVE MY GOD AND THERE'S NO DOUBT

Use me God

take this heart O God and work Your wonders
form the depths of my soul and its inner most place
to the physical body, the feet and my face
for You are alpha and omega, beginning and end
my fortress, shelter, comforter and friend
for not by my strength but by Yours
change me and mold me, all in your course
for no longer will i change by my strength alone
but by letting You change me, giving You my throne
for the king over my life You are
over everything i have, both near and far
always depending and looking to Thee
for it is Your truth that sets me free!
i thank thee Lord, for changing me
for helping me be who You want me to be
in all this i pray that this will come true
that there will be less of me and more of You

In His Name

the world is in turmoil
but satan's plans we'll foil
a war against him we have declared
our God with us we're not scared
we intercede for our people we pray for his grace
that one day we'll meet in His dwelling place
in the presence of the most high
and with one voice our hearts will cry
we give Him all honour and glory
and our mouths will tell the story
of how He came and died for us
and how in Him we've come to trust
never again will we bow down
to other gods and kings and crowns
for we have found where we belong
and forever we'll sing His songs
He is our strength and our Lord
our redeemer our reward
nothing we give is sacrifice
for what we give is of no price
compared to Him our God our all
what we give compared is small
and forever i will sing His praise
forever covered by His grace
in His presence overflowing
in the presence of the all knowing
humbled in His very presence
all that i can do is bow
and open up my mouth and worship Him now
pledging to Him my obedience all
trusting He'll never let me fall
for He is my God and my rock
and i dont care how much they mock
i will sing to Him with everything
all my praises to Him i bring!
oh Lord please take my broken heart
please Lord mend it part by part
for blessed be Thy name oh God
for Your word is my spiritual sword
and evermore my heart will sing
forever praising my heavenly king!

Hurt

lock me up and throw away the key
let the world know not of what happens to me
i've caused so much hurt and so much pain
in the end all to no one's gain
the things i've done are unforgivable
and my apologies unacceptable
never again will i see
the great world as it used to be
this time i've done something worse
this hurt i've caused only myself i curse
the road in my life is always rough
and the pain i feel is never enough
the people i've hurt and lies i've told
i now see with their letters in bold
i thought it would be long before i've known
the fruits of the seeds that i have sown
this great pain i feel inside
is all thanks to my sense of pride
my fist pound the door in rage
like a angered beast in it's cage
had i known i'd cause such pain
the way i did things wouldn't have been the same
now i don't know what to do
because i know my chance i blew
sometimes i don't know wad people see
in such a loser guy like me
i can't even go sometime without
hurting the people i care about
i don't know the reason for my life
the reason i go through all this strife
all i do is bring hurt and tears
through this whole life and all my years
this is why i made this wish of mine
that no one will ever be hurt again in my lifetime

Did you know?

did you know when you're alone
when you're cold and chilled to the bone
there is always someone there
sumone that will always care
He watches over all you do
till the day your life is through
He carries you through all your fears
and comforts you in times of tears
did you know that when you cry
or when you say "i wanna die"
in His heart He feels your pain
He feels your hurt and feels your strain
He forgives you for all you've done
He forgave you from day one
so when you think that life ain't fair
you can reach Him through a simple prayer
He will help you through it all
through all problems big or small
the world is harsh that's what they say
but all we gotta do is pray
by your side is where He'll be
I noe because He's there for me

Purpose

i ask the reason for my birth
i ask what my life is worth
i think about it night and day
i ask this question when i pray
in my life my hurts and pains
all my losts and all my gain
everything that i have done
many in the name of fun
right now at this point in time
the answer i seek is still not mine
but i hope that i will find
the answer to my question in mind
and i will serve Him everyday
because in my heart is where He stays
for when my purpose in life He shows
only then will i ever know

My life

Hurt and alone
my heart like stone
heavy burden on my chest
so much so i get no rest
all my problems i can't share
because the world doesn't seem to care
they don't care that i am crying
they all think that i am lying
they all say that i ain't good
and it hurts to be misunderstood
i sit in my corner and i cry
my heart feeling empty and dry
sometimes i feel that i have no worth
and ask the reason for my birth
one day someone said to me
that someone could set me free
he told me Jesus was the way
and in my heart Jesus would stay
Jesus took me and He changed me
and made me the best that i could be
i love him more and more each day
because i know that he is the way
so take this little piece of advice
believe in Jesus it's real nice
He will always walk beside you
till the day your life is through

The beast in my heart

as the night falls still and shadows loom
i sit here thinking in my room
i sit and think of the bad things i've done
and i regret almost each and every one
i now know it is far too late
and it's proberbly me they hate
i wish that time i could turn back
and improve in the places i lack
to control this beast i have in me
to keep it hidden for none to see
i know now that i can't hide
from the reality i have inside
to learn supress is not the key
if i try it will control me
to learn to control is what i must do
but such an uphill battle it is too
but soon i will slay the beast
and then at least i will haf peace
only time will tell if i will win
my battle over this evil sin
so now i am gonna take my leave
and win this beast with 1 final heave
and when i do you all will know
for in my face the results will show